Title: A Father’s Love
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Timeline: Two weeks after Duodecim.
Synopsis: With a little help from a surprising source,
Ethan shows Giles that not everything was as it seemed in his past.
“Hello, Ethan.” Giles stated, not even looking up from the
pile of paperwork in front of him.
Ethan arched an eyebrow and
walked into the office. “How’d you know
I was here?”
Giles signed his name to the
bottom of a form as he gestured to Callie, sitting in her bed and stomping her
front paws in excitement with a hard rubber ball in her mouth. “She’s better than a personal assistant when
it comes to telling me who has arrived.”
Ethan chuckled and motioned
Callie over, grinning as she ran to him and dropped the ball at his feet. Giles finally closed the manilla folder and
looked up, narrowing his eyes as he took in Ethan’s appearance.
“You look tired. Are you alright?”
Hearing the concern in his
friend’s voice, Ethan rolled the ball across the office and met Giles’ eyes. “I am
tired, but I’m fine. The perils of being
sixty and having a husband twenty years younger than me.”
Ethan mentally smacked himself
when Giles lowered his eyes. “You’re not
sixty, Rupert.”
“No.” Giles agreed, rolling the pen between his fingers. “But when I am, Buffy will be thirty-six…our
youngest child will be three years old and – ”
“Hey!” Ethan glared at him and shook his head. “Sixty doesn’t mean ‘dead’. What’s got you so worried? You afraid that you won’t be able to keep up
with her?”
Giles rolled his eyes and leaned
back in his chair. “Not everything is
about sex, Ethan.”
Ethan smirked and rubbed the top
of Callie’s head as she returned with the ball.
“So…you’re still able to keep up with her, then?”
Giles furrowed his brow at his
friend, pointedly ignoring the question as he continued with his earlier
thought. “There was a time when I
thought that I’d probably be raising three or four children on my own. But, now I worry that I’m going to leave her
with five children and how – ”
Ethan kicked the ball for Callie
again, his smirk quickly fading as concern filled his dark eyes. “Leave her?
You’re not sick or anything, are you?”
“What? No…no, I feel fine.” Giles rushed to calm Ethan’s nerves. “I’m not sick, I’m not dying. I just…worry that my age is going to catch up
with me soon and where does that leave Buffy?”
“In love with you.” Ethan answered in a tone that stated it
should’ve been the most obvious answer Giles could have received to that
question. “Do you honestly think that
Buffy would love you any less?”
Giles shook his head
slowly. “No. But, I also don’t want her having to fret
over me…”
Ethan snorted and sat down on
the arm of the couch. “Okay, you’re
nearing sixty…not ninety. It’s not as if
she’s going to be switching from changing Dec’s nappies to changing yours. And I know that you said it’s not about sex,
but…seriously, now…is everything okay in that department?”
Giles nodded and stared at the
pen he was twirling between his long fingers.
“More than.”
“Rupert…”
“My father became ill when he
was my age.”
And that’s when it hit
Ethan. Giles’ concerns weren’t about his
age and they weren’t about Buffy.
“Thinking about your dad lately,
mate?”
Giles heaved a heavy sigh and
nodded. “Probably an age related
comparison between myself and him. I
don’t want Buffy having to deal with what Mum did. I watched my mother care for him as he
weakened. I don’t want my children to go
through that...watching their mother give up everything for nothing. Nothing she did was going to change the fact
that he was going to die…but, it didn’t stop her.”
“But, she would.” Ethan responded softly, smiling warmly as
Giles met his eyes. “She loves you that
much, Rupe. I know that you and your
father didn’t get on most of the time, and I know that your mum didn’t agree
with his parenting techniques…but, it’s what you do when you love someone.
You’d drop everything to care for Buffy if she were to fall ill, yeah?”
The corner of Giles’ mouth
pulled into a smile. “You’re telling me
that I’m worrying too much over nothing, aren’t you? Isn’t that my job in this relationship of
ours?”
Ethan gave him a wink and then
laughed as Callie jumped up and forced Ethan to give her a cuddle. “Go home, Rupert. Spend the evening playing with your children
and helping them with their homework…and then spend the night making love to
your wife. Let her show you that
nearing sixty is nothing to concern yourself with.”
With a snap of Giles’ fingers,
Callie pushed away from Ethan and sat down dutifully. Ethan gave her a gentle pat and whispered
‘good girl’…to which she responded with a wag of her tail.
Giles exhaled slowly and dropped
the pen onto the closed folder. “When
did you become so insightful?”
Ethan smiled broadly and stood
up, shrugging a shoulder as he moved across the room and sat on the corner of
Giles’ desk. “Maybe years of you telling
me basically the same thing, in more proper terms, of course, finally took
hold. Did you ever ask yourself why
your mum became Nurse Nightingale to your father?”
Giles shook his head as he
looked up at Ethan. “She was his wife.”
“She loved you. Which is why people tend to do things that
you would see as strange…because they love you.” Ethan smiled and reached out, placing his
hand on Giles’ shoulder. “Maybe you
should read
“
Ethan squeezed Giles’ shoulder
and then removed his hand, amusement dancing in his eyes as he gestured
vaguely. “I spend hours here in this
building. I get bored…I read. Figured I’d read old Watchers’ diaries to see
if they were as stuffy as you used to be.
Picked his at random one day…gotta say I was surprised when I realized
that he was the best friend of a ‘Richard Giles’.”
Giles nodded slowly, lowering
his gaze. “They were in the same class
at the Academy. From what I remember, he
died a few years after my father.”
“Yeah, he did.” Ethan said as he slid from the desk. “Read the journal, mate.”
Giles looked up as Ethan made
his way to the door. “Richard and I
never…we grew apart, Ethan.”
“I know.” Ethan replied, offering Giles a warm
smile. “It’s all about knowledge…and
closure. Go home now…do the family thing
with the kids and wife. Read later.”
With that said, Ethan walked out
of the office. Giles thought for a
moment that the last ten minutes of his life had been rather strange. And then he smiled, remembering Ethan’s
comment about behaviour that Giles might deem as strange.
With a chuckle and a shake of
his head, he stood up and pulled his keys from the top drawer of his desk. Callie ran to the office door and sat down,
gently nudging her lead with her nose.
“Just need to stop by the
library on the way out,
Giles smiled as he stepped into
the hallway, locking his office door as he watched Callie run down the hall and
sit down in front of the lift doors. He whistled a soft tune as he made his way
to her and pushed the button, chatting quietly to her as they waited for the
elevator to arrive.
He chuckled softly as Callie
leaned against his leg, nudging her head up against his hand.
* * *
After dinner, Giles had helped
Lucas with his math homework before going over the latest lesson that Braden
had learned at the Academy. He smiled
proudly as his oldest child explained the difference between magic and
sorcery…as according to the Council.
Braden was learning so quickly, so thoroughly, that it consistently
surprised Giles.
Each time he had mentioned his
surprise to Buffy, she had just laughed…stating that she was anything but surprised. After all, Braden Giles was his father’s son.
The children had been put to bed
and Callie had performed her nightly ritual of patrolling the house before
taking herself to bed in front of the fireplace. Giles had pulled
Her light-hearted jibes
continued off and on as he read through the pages. After an hour of reading, he closed the book
and gestured towards the stairs that led to the basement. Buffy crossed her arms over her chest and
arched an eyebrow at him.
“I think I’d much rather go to
bed than to spar with you tonight…”
Giles shook his head and wrapped
his fingers around her forearm, pulling her with him as he walked towards the
basement door. “And that is why I am the Watcher…you need to train,
Buffy.”
“Anything that has to do with
the ancient book you brought home?” She questioned,
willingly following him down the stairs.
“The book is hardly ancient…and
no, your training routine tonight has nothing to do with it.” He made his way across the room, dropping the
book onto a stack of training mats as he pulled two swords from the weapons
cabinet and tossed one to her. “It does,
however, have to do with the fact that you haven’t trained properly in nearly a
week and you’re scheduled for patrol tomorrow night. I’d rather you come home in one piece.”
Buffy smiled, twirling the sword
in her hand. “And who said you weren’t
romantic?”
Giles returned the smile with a
soft one of his own and raised his sword.
Buffy raised an eyebrow as
Giles’ sword fell to the floor.
“Everything okay?”
Giles swallowed, nodding as he
wiped the sweat from his brow. “Very,
um…very good, Buffy.”
Buffy lowered her sword and
stepped forward, placing her hand on the side of his neck. “Your pulse is racing, Giles…and I’ve never
been able to actually flip the hilt from your hand before. Are you sure – ”
Her question ended abruptly as
he grabbed her, turning their bodies and pressing her back against the
wall. She let the sword slip from her
hand as she stared into his eyes, which were growing darker.
“Giles?”
Instead of answering her, he
lifted her up. He pinned her against the
wall as her legs automatically wrapped around his hips. His mouth covered hers without hesitation,
his tongue nudging between her lips as she draped her arms over his
shoulders. His kisses were hard and
demanding…and she returned them with an equal amount of passion.
When his left hand slid under
her shirt and pushed her bra up over her breasts, she pulled from the kiss and
stared into his eyes.
“What’s wrong?” She whispered breathlessly.
He furrowed his brow, shaking
his head as his hand released her breast.
“Nothing…”
Buffy licked her lips and ran
her fingers through his sweat-dampened hair.
“This was about desperation, Giles…I could taste it. Please…tell me what’s wrong.”
Knowing that she wouldn’t
believe him if he said ‘nothing’ again, he sighed and gently lowered her back
to the ground. He took a step back and
swallowed thickly.
When he started to turn away
from her, she quickly wrapped her hand around his wrist to stop him.
“Hey…”
He stopped, but didn’t look at
her as he whispered a simple statement.
“It wasn’t all desperation.”
“I know.” She replied quickly, moving to stand in front
of him and lifting her hand to the side of his face. “I know, honey…but, there’s something wrong…”
When he glanced into her eyes,
she saw the flicker of uncertainty. She
sighed heavily and shook her head as her thumb gently stroked his cheek.
“We’ve talked about this,
Rupert…your age isn’t a problem here. In
fact, I thought we’d gotten past all of that…”
Giles nodded slowly, leaning
into her touch. “We have. It’s…it’s not really about my age. Well…it is, but…it’s different…”
She led him over to the stack of
training mats in the corner of the room and sat down, pulling him down next to
her. “Okay, I think you need to start
somewhere other than wherever you just did…because I’m confused.”
He chuckled softly, lacing their
fingers together and staring at their joined hands. “I’m not at all surprised.”
“Does this have to do with the
musty old book you brought home?”
He nodded again and exhaled
deeply, lifting his eyes to hers. “More
to do with my father than anything else, really.”
“Your father? I haven’t heard you talk about your dad
in…years, really.”
“Mm.” Giles agreed, lifting their hands and placing
a soft kiss on the back of hers before turning sideways to face her. “The ‘musty old book’, as you called it, is
the journal of William Bradford.”
Buffy thought about the name,
narrowing her eyes in thought before shaking her head. “Never heard of him, should I have?”
“No, not really. He…was the best friend of Richard Giles.”
She took a deep breath and
leaned back against the wall. “Okay…so
why are you reading your dad’s best friend’s journal?”
“Because Ethan said I needed to
in order to learn more about my parents.”
Buffy rolled her eyes, pulling
her hand out of Giles’ and running her fingers through her hair. “Okay, you know the whole point of this
conversation was to make me less
confused, right?”
“Richard was fifty-seven when he
fell ill. I watched my mother do
everything she could to nurse him back to health…even when I told her that he
was beyond saving.” When Buffy’s eyes
widened, he sighed. “I actually meant
that as there was nothing that could be done to save his life…medically. Saying that, Richard and I never made our
peace…so, I suppose I could understand why you would think I meant otherwise.”
“You think you’re going to get
sick and die?” Buffy whispered, placing
her hand on his thigh.
Giles shook his head and offered
her a loving smile. “No. But, I don’t want our children going through
that. I was older…an adult…and it still
pained me to watch my mother run herself into the ground for nothing. I don’t want our children watching you do the
same.”
“Rupert…he was your father, her
husband. I understand that you and he
had some issues, but…”
“She did what she did because
she loved me.” He interrupted
softly. “She had to keep him alive until
he was sixty…and had she failed, I would’ve died alongside him.”
“What?” She breathed, her eyes glistening when she
heard the pain in his voice.
Giles reached behind him,
sliding the book towards him from where he had dropped it earlier. He fingered the leather reverently before
heaving a deep sigh and opening it nearly three-quarters the way through. His fingertips lightly glided down the page
before he turned the book for her to read the carefully handwritten entry.
“This…this was written on the
night Richard Giles died.”
Buffy regarded him carefully
before lowering her gaze to the open book.
As she read the words, she began to understand what was troubling her
husband so.
* * *
Giles busied himself with
cleaning the swords they had used during training, glancing over at Buffy once
in a while as she continued to flip the pages of the book. He had just returned the swords to their
resting place and locked the cabinet doors when he heard her whisper his name.
It was then that he knew that
she had finished. He rested his palm
against the cabinet door and hung his head as he sighed heavily.
“I…was a complete prat.” He whispered in response.
Buffy shook her head, quickly
sliding from the training mats and making her way to him. She soothingly rubbed his back, placing a
tender kiss on his shoulder.
“You didn’t know, Giles.”
“I didn’t want to know.” He corrected,
leaning forward and resting his forehead against the smooth wood. “All I saw was my father being a…I never
questioned his actions. I should have
questioned him.”
“He couldn’t have given you the
answers you wanted, Rupert.”
Giles turned slowly and looked
into her glistening eyes. “I know that he
couldn’t have divulged the fact that he had made a deal with a demon to save my
life. But, he could have told me something…anything to let me know that what he was doing was out of love…and
not disappointment.”
Buffy slid her arms around his waist
and rested her head against his chest.
“You used to have trouble voicing your true feelings, you know.”
“Never to my children.” He replied sadly, wrapping his arms around
her and dropping a kiss onto the top of her head. “I’d never let my children think that they
were a disappointment to me.”
She was quiet for a minute and
then raised her head to look up at him.
“Giles?”
“Hm?” He murmured, tucking a strand of hair behind
her ear.
“
Giles nodded, swallowing
hard. “My father took Ewan’s death
extremely hard. I’m not sure he ever
really got over it. I’m rather sure that
a parent never gets over the death of their child, but…he…”
When he trailed off, Buffy
tilted her head slightly. “You okay?”
Giles shook his head, his
thoughts obviously racing in his head.
“He blamed himself for Ewan’s death.”
“What? I thought Ewan was sick?”
“He was…” His eyes darted to the book and he gently
pulled from Buffy’s embrace. “But, what
if Ewan’s illness was brought on by the same demon who threatened to kill me?”
Buffy watched him as he raced
across the room and grabbed the book, quickly flipping the pages further back.
“But…why wouldn’t they have just killed both of you at the same time?”
Giles paused for a moment and
met her eyes. “Because they didn’t see
me as a threat.”
“Huh?” She asked as she made her way back over to
the stack of mats.
“
Buffy noticed the tremble in his
hand as he lifted it, running his fingers through his hair. “Giles?”
Giles cleared his throat and
read directly from the entry. “A Vaterin
approached Richard three months ago.
Richard refused the demon’s order of handing over the Mishtwanai. Three days ago, his son fell ill. The doctors have been unable to find a cure for
the boy’s illness. The Council
physicians have deemed it the work of demonic persuasion…and have stated that
the boy’s condition is terminal. My
God…”
“Giles?”
“You weren’t the original
Mishtwanai, Buffy. Ewan was…” He met her eyes and inhaled a shaky
breath. “My brother was supposed to
protect our son.”
Buffy stared at him, her
confusion evident in her eyes. “But…why
didn’t they just go after you instead?”
“The origin of the Protector
wasn’t known…only the Mishtwanai.” Giles
answered softly, still reeling from the news.
“As for me…a Vaterin can only see ten years into the future. In ten years, I was not a member of the
Council in any way…”
“Okay, I get that…sort of. But…if they could only see ten years into the
future, how did they know Ewan was the Mishtwanai? I mean…the Protector wasn’t born until
what…forty years later?”
“Thirty-eight…” Giles corrected automatically before
continuing. “The Mishtwanai is named
before birth. Should the Mishtwanai
perish before the birth of the Protector, another will be named Mishtwanai.”
Buffy recognized the look in her
husband’s eyes and smiled understandingly.
“We’re researching, aren’t we?”
“I…I need to know more, Buffy.”
She nodded in agreement and
pressed a soft kiss to his temple. “Then
we research, honey.”
Giles whispered a ‘thank you’
and watched as she picked up the book, tucking it under her left arm as she
wrapped her right hand around his wrist.
“No need to thank me,
Rupert…this is your family.”
Giles stood and took a deep
breath to compose himself before following her up the stairs.
Research wasn’t as much
‘research’ as it was Giles reading different passages from Bradford’s
journal. As she listened to her husband,
Buffy was once again reminded of what a beautiful reading voice he had. When she sighed softly, he looked up at her.
“Are you alright, Buffy?”
“Huh? Oh…”
She smiled as she blushed lightly.
“You know that thing that happens most of the time when I listen to you
read? Well, this is one of those
times…and it’s a little inappropriate right now…that’s all.”
He gave her a soft smile and ran
his hand through his hair for the hundredth time that night. “I assume you’ll give me a raincheck?”
“Yeah.” She chuckled, nodding as she leaned back in
her chair. When she noticed him bite his
bottom lip lightly, her smile faded.
“Talk to me, Giles. Tell me
what’s going through your head right now.”
He breathed a heavy sigh and
glanced at the book. “Anger, guilt, more
anger…”
“Guilt?”
Meeting her eyes, he nodded
slowly. “I’ve spent most of my life
being angry at my father for whatever reason.
And…I’ve just found out that he died to save my life. A Vaterin looked into the future and realized
that I had the potential of becoming a successful Watcher…and knowing that I
was the older brother of the Mishtwanai…”
“Hey…” She whispered, reaching out and covering his
hand with hers when she heard his voice tremble. “It’s okay, Giles.”
“He sacrificed his life because
I had potential…potential. And yet…he died letting me believe that I was
a disappointment to him.”
Buffy rubbed her thumb over the
back of his hand, feeling her heart break a little for him when she watched his
eyes glisten. “Maybe he would’ve told you
if he’d been allowed…”
Giles shook his head and looked
into her eyes. “No, he wouldn’t have…it
wasn’t in his nature. He had no trouble
telling me what a fool I was for leaving the Academy, how irresponsible and
dangerous I had become by using magick…but, I don’t remember him ever telling
me that he loved me…or that he was proud of me.”
“Giles, you know he was proud of
you.”
“Oh, yes. A clap on the shoulder…a ‘well done,
Rupert’. Never a hug and a ‘good show,
son’…always ‘Rupert’.” He clenched his
jaw and sat back in his chair, pulling his hand out from under Buffy’s. “Can you imagine his reaction if he’d known
that Amelia was pregnant? Or how many
girls I’d bedded after I left the Academy?
Or Ethan? Would he have given me
a ‘well done, Rupert’ while Ethan gasped underneath me? Or…”
He looked up suddenly, regret in
his eyes over what had spilled out of his mouth in his anger. “Buffy…God, I’m sorry…”
“For what?” She asked, genuinely surprised by his sudden
reaction. “I know all of this, Giles…and
I’m pretty sure that I know how Ethan would have been after a night with
you. There’s nothing to apologize
for. You’re angry and understandably so…you
need to rant and rave, I get that.”
“I’m tired of being angry.” Giles responded, taking a deep breath. “Richard may not have been a loving father,
but…when backed against the wall, he gave the ultimate sacrifice for me. He did what I would do…though, I would go
about it differently.”
Buffy was quiet for a moment and
then moved from her chair to sit on the corner of the desk. “Maybe he thought it would be easier for
you.”
He furrowed his brow and stared
at her. “I’m sorry?”
“Anger is much easier to work
through than guilt. And…you’ve had
issues with guilt for as long as I’ve known you. I’ll bet that you had problems with it when
you were young, too. It’s part of what
makes you you.”
“You’re saying that he treated
me as he did because he was worried the guilt would devour me?” Giles asked in disbelief.
Buffy shrugged a shoulder and
looked down at the book lying open next to her leg. “He got sick not long after your return to
the Academy, right?”
“Yes.” He replied softly, watching her close the
book and push it to the side.
“You were fragile.” She whispered, turning her eyes to his before
continuing. “Unsure, confidence at a
low, willing to do anything to prove yourself…your trustworthiness. I’ve seen you in that mindset, Giles…it wouldn’t
take much for you to break when you’re that fragile.”
“He wouldn’t have known…” Giles started to protest, stopping when Buffy
interrupted him with one quietly spoken statement.
“Your mother would have.”
Giles lowered his eyes,
understanding exactly what Buffy was saying…and knowing she was right. When he had returned home in tattered jeans,
hands shaking as he rang the doorbell…his mother was the one who had been
there. She had been the one to hold him
as he broke down and whispered his apologies to her.
She hadn’t asked what had
happened to him. She hadn’t needed
to…she saw the fear and pain in his eyes.
Eyes that had still been glassy from the remnants of drugs and magick
that had ravaged his body for the time he’d been away.
He looked back up when he felt
Buffy’s lips press a soft kiss to his forehead.
She offered him a loving smile and curled a strand of his hair around
her finger.
“I think it would’ve done you
more damage to know the truth. And I
think your mother knew that as well.
Looking back on it now, don’t you see it?”
He nodded slowly, swallowing
hard as he felt his anger leave his body.
The grandfather clock chimed once as Buffy slid from the desk and ran
her fingertips down the side of his face.
“It’s late, babe…” She looked into his eyes, glistening again
with unshed tears. “And you need sleep.”
“Buffy…” He whispered, leaning into her touch.
“Sleep.” She repeated with a smile as he shifted in
the chair, wrapping his left arm around her waist and pulling her closer to
him. “You’re exhausted…and this has been
a pretty emotional revelation…so, we sleep.”
He licked his lips and nodded in
agreement. Pushing his chair back, he
stood and pulled her against his chest before dropping a soft kiss on the top
of her head.
“I love you.”
Her arms tightened around him as
she pressed her ear to his chest, sighing as she listened to the steady rhythm
of his heart. “I love you too.”
They stood like that for a few
moments, holding one another as the clock continued to tick away the
minutes. When Buffy felt, and heard, him
yawn as his exhaustion crept upon him, she pulled out of his embrace and led
him to the bedroom.
Callie lifted her head, yawning
widely as she stood and stretched before setting off on her middle of the night
patrol of the house.
* * *
Buffy had yet to fall
asleep. They’d gone to bed…two hours
ago, she realized as she looked at the clock on her bedside table. It had taken Giles less than five minutes to
fall asleep…and less than ten minutes after that, he was snoring softly as he
sank deeper into sleep.
It didn’t surprise Buffy at
all…Giles had been exhausted, emotionally more than physically. And sleep had always overtaken him quickly
when there were emotional issues involved.
She smiled as she watched him, the pale moonlight seeping in through the
blinds casting a bluish glow over his skin.
Her smile faded as his brow
furrowed in sleep. Reaching up quickly,
she lovingly stroked his brow with her fingertips as she whispered that
everything was okay. After a moment he
relaxed and when her fingers grazed his lips as she lowered her hand back to
his chest, he sighed softly.
She watched him closely, her
smile returning when he mumbled her name as he shifted closer to her. Glancing at his mouth, she gave in to her
sudden desire and gently pressed her lips to his. She wasn’t overly surprised when he
responded to the kiss. He had failed to
respond only once in their time together…and that was an instance that Buffy
tried not to think about very often.
She also wasn’t surprised when
she slowly pulled away from the kiss and found his green eyes staring at
her. She smiled warmly at him, tenderly
running her fingers over his temple.
“Sorry, I really didn’t mean to
wake you.” She whispered as his right
hand glided over her back.
“S’alright.” He murmured, licking his lips as he drifted
further away from slumber. “Are you
wanting – ”
“No.” She interrupted quickly, but not stopping his
hand as it slid down to her hip. “I
just…watching you sleep, hearing you whisper my name as you sleep…it’s not sex
I’m after right now, Giles…I just wanted to kiss you.”
He was quiet for a moment,
studying her eyes as best he could in the darkened room. “Do you want to kiss me again?”
Her eyes darted to his lips as
she nodded. “Do you want me to?”
“I do.” He whispered, lifting his left hand to cup
her cheek. “Very much, I do.”
“I really didn’t wake you up for sex…”
“That’s reassuring, considering
I’m far too tired for sex right now.” He
replied with a smile, carefully pulling her on top of him. “I want you to kiss me, Buffy. It doesn’t
always lead to sex…”
Buffy looked slightly concerned
as she straddled him, realizing there was a distinct lack of hard flesh
underneath her. “Is everything okay?”
He nodded slowly, allowing his
palms to rest on her thighs. “I’m just
tired, love. Give me until tomorrow…I’ll
ravage you then.”
She chuckled at the smile
showing in his eyes and then leaned down to kiss him. “Promise?”
“Mm-hm. Promise.”
He murmured as she nibbled at his bottom lip. “God, don’t tease me, Buffy. Kiss me…”
She responded to his gravelled
whisper by nipping at his lip with her teeth and then covering his mouth with
hers when he groaned. With no further
hesitation, she plunged her tongue into his mouth, delighting in the way his
tongue slid against hers.
When she started to move on top
of him, he cradled her face between his hands and pulled from the kiss. He was breathing heavily as he looked into
her slightly glazed eyes.
“Do you need to come?”
She swallowed hard and
concentrated on the sensation of his heart pounding under her palm. “I’m okay…”
“I can…I may be too tired to
make love to you, but…I can make you come, Buffy.”
She trembled at his words, or it
could’ve been the tone he had used.
Either way, he smiled as she trembled again and murmured his name. Interpreting her actions as a ‘yes’, he
reignited the kiss. And then he trembled
himself when he felt her moan.
And at that moment, he silently
cursed his exhaustion.
Buffy tore her mouth from
Giles’, biting her lip to stifle her cry as her orgasm crashed over her. Giles licked his lips, lifting his left hand
to wipe the sweat from the side of her neck.
He swallowed thickly when he noticed that she had broken the skin on her
bottom lip.
“Buffy…” He whispered, running his thumb over her lip
and through the small amount of blood.
“You’ve made yourself bleed, love.”
She lightly ground her hips
against him as she watched him lick the pad of his thumb. “That really shouldn’t turn me on as much as
it does…”
He stared into her eyes and she
arched an eyebrow as she felt him twitch beneath her. “Well, then…this is a surprise…”
“Apparently, watching
you…feeling you…hearing you come is a cure for exhaustion.” He replied with a small smile.
She looked into his eyes,
shaking her head when she clearly saw the still-remaining weariness. “No…not a cure.”
His eyes widened as she moved
down his body, kneeling between his legs as she gently tugged his pajama
bottoms down. “Um…”
She curled her hand around his quickly
emerging erection and met his eyes.
“You’re exhausted, Giles.
Just…let me do this for you.
Please?”
Any reply he was going to give
her was cut off by his groan as she lowered her mouth to his cock. His eyes closed and his left hand found its way
to the back of her head, moving with her but not forcing her.
“Jesus, Buffy…”
She looked up at him, smiling
inwardly as she watched his jaw clench and then release. She reached for his free hand, prying his
grip from the sheets and lacing their fingers together. When she gently squeezed his hand, he opened
his eyes and looked down at her.
“God, I love you.” He whispered gruffly, his fingers flexing
against her scalp as she increased her suction.
“Not long…”
She doubled her efforts, lightly
scraping her teeth along his shaft before pulling him into her throat. His fingers tightened in her hair and his
head fell back to the pillow as he uttered a soft curse.
When she felt him thicken in her
throat, she knew she had a decision to make.
Did she keep going as she was and swallow as he exploded? Or did she pull back and watch his come
splatter over his chest and then spend a lazy few minutes cleaning his skin
with her tongue?
Her decision was made quickly
when she took into account that her second option would just overstimulate him
in his current state of weariness. And
so she continued sliding her mouth along his length and then clamping her lips
around the head when she heard his lust-gravelled voice tell her that he was
coming.
She felt his hand grip hers
tightly as his back arched and looked up as he moaned her name. No sooner had ‘Buffy’ left his lips did his
cock erupt in her mouth. She swallowed
quickly, not surprised when she had another orgasm.
His grip on her hand loosened
and as his other hand fell from her head, she pulled her mouth from his
softening cock. Their eyes met and they
shared a lazy smile before sharing a loving kiss.
“That, um…wasn’t necessary,
love.” He whispered as she settled back
down next to him. He smiled as she
stared at him. “Of course, it was
greatly appreciated.”
Her smile shone in her eyes as
she propped her head up on her hand as she reached over and ran her thumb over
his bottom lip. “Tell me something…”
He sighed contentedly and gave
her a subtle nod in request for her to continue.
“Given our lives, I should find
it disturbing when you taste me…my blood, I mean.”
“Mm…” He gazed into her eyes, softly kissing her
thumb as she sighed.
“But, I don’t. Why do you think that is?”
He thought for a second and then
rolled onto his side to face her.
“Because you know there’s no danger.
And we both know how your blood affects me.”
Buffy thought about that for a
moment and then leaned into him, gently kissing his lips. “I take it that you didn’t make a habit of
tasting your partners’ blood?”
He snorted softly, sliding his
arm over her hip. “No…not at all. Unless it was ritualistic purposes…and I can
count on one hand the number of times that happened.”
“Do you ever wonder if you fathered
any children during that time?”
His eyes narrowed slightly at
the seemingly sudden change of topic and his smile faded. “I’m sorry?”
“I wonder…sometimes.” She admitted softly. “I mean, I’m pretty sure you weren’t the
poster boy for safe sex back then.”
“Where is this coming
from?” He asked, swallowing the lump
that had appeared in his throat.
She shrugged her shoulder and
traced his cheek with her fingertips.
“You said something earlier about what your father’s reaction would’ve
been if he’d known how many girls you…”
She trailed off when she saw the
tears well in his eyes. “Giles?”
“I’m sorry.” He whispered lowering his gaze. “I…the truth is that there’s a very real
chance that maybe…most of the girls were one-nighters. I...can’t even remember what the majority of
them looked like, or what their names were, or…if I even knew their names to
begin with. But, no…no, I don’t wonder
about it. Because if I did, it would
only eat at me until there was nothing left.
And I can’t – ”
She cut him off with a kiss,
sliding her fingers into his hair and kissing him until the sudden tension
began to leave his body. He slowly ended
the kiss and looked into her eyes.
“I wouldn’t have been a very
good father back then, Buffy. In fact, I
would well imagine that Richard would’ve been considered a model parent
compared to me at that time.”
“You would’ve been a good father
to Katie.” Buffy countered, curling a
strand of his hair around her finger.
“That would’ve been very
different. I was in love with
Amelia…there was no love felt for anyone after I left the Academy.” He sighed softly and swallowed. “Until I met you.”
Buffy shook her head as she
smiled. “Jenny…”
“No, you.” He stared into her eyes and took a deep
breath. “Haven’t you realized in the
time we’ve been together?”
“Realized what?” She asked, letting the strand of hair slip
from her finger and then moving her hand to his chest.
“You taught me that it was okay
to love again, Buffy. It was because of
you that I was able to let myself love Jenny.
You and Willow and Xander…if it weren’t for the three of you…” He blew out a heavy breath and pulled her
closer to him. “I wouldn’t be the man I
am today.”
She relaxed in his arms, her
forehead pressed to his chest. “Why am I
just hearing this little tidbit now?”
“Because I honestly thought you
knew.” He replied quietly. “I love you so very much, Buffy.”
“Twelve years and I’m still
learning things about you.” She pulled
back slightly and looked up at him, a soft smile pulling at her lips. “And I love you too, Giles.”
Giles forced back a yawn and
then sighed. “I’m sorry, but…do you
think, perhaps, we could continue this conversation in the morning?”
“You are the only person I’ve
ever known to be able to string together a question like that while fighting
off a yawn.” Buffy chuckled and pulled
the sheet and blanket up over their bodies.
“And, yeah…we can talk about this more later, if you want.”
“G’night, love.” He murmured, his eyes closing quickly as
sleep caught back up to him.
She returned the sentiment and
then watched him for a few minutes longer, closing her eyes only when she heard
his breathing change that signalled his fall into slumber. Snuggling closer to him, she let the sound of
his rhythmic heartbeat lull her to sleep.
* * *
The room was lighter when Buffy
woke and she was instantly aware that she was probably the last in the house to
wake. She smiled as she watched Giles,
who was currently lying beside of her though fully dressed, lift a giggling
Declan into the air.
“Has he had breakfast?” She asked sleepily.
Giles nodded, his smile growing
as he lowered Declan to his chest and tickled him. “All five, fed and dressed.”
Buffy arched an eyebrow and pushed
herself up, grinning as Declan reached for her.
“What time is it?”
“Quarter to eight.” He replied, sitting up and leaning against
the headboard.
Buffy glanced at him as she
played with Declan, taking in his very casual dress of jeans and a simple light
green button-up shirt. “Not going in to
work today?”
“You have patrol tonight.” He gave as his answer. “I’m taking the children to school and then
coming back to spend the day with you and Declan.”
“Giles…”
He looked into her eyes and
gently shook his head. “I can work just
as well from home once in a while if I need to.”
She leaned over and gave him a
tender kiss. This was not new behaviour
for him…this had started from the very first ‘scheduled’ patrol. He’d stay home from work and spend the day
with her.
Before Declan was born, they’d
spend the day alternating between making love and training…sometimes mixing the
two. Now, the day would be spent playing
with Dec, snuggling on the couch, some light training with Declan watching safely
from his playpen in the corner of the room, and making love when Declan went
down for his naps.
“Do I have time for a quick
shower before you need to leave?”
Giles nodded, his eyes darting
to her chest…inhaling deeply when he saw that he could easily make out her
hardening nipples under the satin nightgown she was wearing. “Mm-hm.”
Buffy chuckled and ducked her
head to catch his gaze again. “Hey…”
He cleared his throat and gave
her a smirk as he climbed out of bed and reached down to pick Declan up. “Come on, son…let’s let Mummy get ready.”
Declan giggled and gently tugged
at the gold hoop in Giles’ ear. Giles
playfully admonished him and then glanced at Buffy, who was watching them in an
almost studious manner.
“Buffy?”
“Huh? Oh…” She
shook her head as if she were clearing her thoughts and smiled. “It’s just…he’s so much like you, Giles. And
I was just kinda wondering what he was going to be when he grows up…you know?”
Giles smiled and gave her a nod
as he kissed the boy’s head. “There will
still be a need for the Council. We may
be able to downsize, but there’ll still be other dimensions that need to be
watched. If that’s what he wants.
Personally, I’m kind of hoping for the green grocer route.”
“I really doubt he’ll go down
that road, babe.” Buffy laughed softly
and then sighed as she looked into his eyes.
“You look better this morning.”
“I feel better…about a lot of
things.” He replied, lifting his free
hand to the side of her face. “You
should get in the shower…”
She nuzzled his hand and closed
her eyes. “Yeah…the kids…school…”
“I was thinking more along the
lines of I’m dangerously close to pushing you against the nearest wall if you
don’t go now.” He interrupted in a low
voice.
Her eyes snapped open and she
grinned. “What is it with you and walls
lately?”
He rubbed his thumb across her
cheek and gave her a wink. “Not just
walls, love.”
Licking her lips, she watched
his eyes darken a shade before taking a shaky breath and stepping back. She reached out and ran her finger down the
side of their son’s face, smiling as he giggled.
“Maybe you should take him into
the living room and let the others wear him out for us.”
Giles snorted a soft laugh, his
eyes sparkling as he gestured towards the ensuite door. “Go on…”
“Going…”
He watched her walk into the
ensuite and shut the door behind her and then looked down at the boy in his
arms who was currently seemingly preoccupied with the scar on his father’s
neck. He chuckled as Declan’s small
finger traced the raised flesh.
“That’s a story for another day,
Dec. Right now…it’s play time with Evan,
what do you think?”
Declan giggled, bouncing
excitedly in Giles’ arms.
Giles walked into the house, dropping
his keys onto the hallway table and chuckling to himself over the argument that
Haddie and Lucas had on the way to school.
Haddie was determined that sunflowers came from the sun, an ‘alien
flower’ she called it. Lucas had argued
that the Sun wasn’t a planet, but a star…therefore it couldn’t be an alien, it
was just a flower. Haddie, in turn,
stated…quite emphatically, in fact…that aliens ‘could so come from
stars!’.
Neither of the children had
argued that sunflowers didn’t come from the sun at all…which would completely
negate the argument of whether aliens could come from stars or if they came
from planets only. And he hadn’t had the
composure to mention that to either of them without bursting into laughter…so
he had just let it be.
It was definitely something to
tell Buffy, he thought as he walked into the living room. He stopped suddenly as soft music began
playing through the speakers of the stereo.
His eyes darted to the couch to find Buffy stretched out, the stereo
remote in her hand, and wearing a blue silk nightgown that barely reached her
knees.
“Hello.” He whispered thickly, his eyes roaming her
body as she stood up.
“Hey.” She whispered back and walked over to him,
dropping the remote onto the coffee table.
“Your plan of letting Evan wear Declan out seems to have worked.”
“Oh?” He smiled, his arms sliding around her as she
ran her hands up his chest.
“Mm-hm.” Her fingers slowly unbuttoned his shirt,
fingertips grazing his skin as she stared into his eyes. “Fell asleep not long after you left.”
He licked his lips as she
pressed her warm mouth to his chest, her eyes still locked with his. He ran the fingers of both hands through her
hair, gently pulling her mouth from his skin.
“How long do you think we have?”
“Long enough…” She was able to get out before his mouth
covered hers.
Her hands pushed his shirt open
as his tongue lovingly stroked hers. Her
fingers absently traced the thick scar tissue on his chest, causing him to
groan into her mouth as he slid his hands down to her hips.
He broke the kiss and stared
into her eyes with a look that could only be described as raw passion as she
roughly pushed his shirt from his shoulders.
Before his shirt hit the floor, his fingers were unfastening his
jeans. He shook his head quickly when
she moved to pull the nightgown over her head.
“Leave it on.” He growled, pulling her back into his arms.
“You don’t want me naked?” She asked breathlessly as he pushed her
against the nearest wall.
He smiled and shook his head, lifting
her up much as he had in the training room the previous night. “I just want to be inside of you.”
She returned his smile, wrapping
her legs around him as he reached between them and pulled his erection from his
jeans. “Good to know we both want the
same thing.”
A groan rumbled in his chest
when his unspoken question was answered as he slid the head of his cock through
her wet folds. She hadn’t been wearing anything underneath the blue satin…and that
turned him on as much as anything else had.
“What were you doing before I
got home?” He asked, rocking his hips
against her…but not entering her…as he lightly fingered her left nipple through
the satin.
“Huh?” She breathed, scratching the back of his neck
as she arched her back in an attempt to increase the pressure of his fingers
against her breast.
“You are so very wet.” He whispered, pinching her nipple and smiling
as she trembled. “Were you touching
yourself? Have a toy out?”
“Just thinking about you.” She whimpered, sliding her right hand down
between their bodies.
He was able to grab her hand
before she could touch his erection, and then pressed it against the wall next
to her head. “All in time, love.”
“God, I want you now…”
He smiled and leaned forward,
flicking his tongue against her bottom lip.
“You were just…thinking about me?”
“Uh-huh…” She mumbled, tightening her legs around
him. “Please…”
“Ssh…” He murmured, kissing her tenderly as he
released her hand and reached between them.
“I don’t want you to beg, Buffy.
I just…” He closed his eyes as he
guided the swollen head into her. “I had
to wait a bit, yeah?”
She smiled at the change in his
accent and then inhaled sharply as he pushed his hips forward. “Too close?”
“Was.” He ground out as he began a slow rhythm. “I’m not sure how long I can do this in this
position right now…”
“You…oh, God…right there…” Her nails dug into his shoulders as she
licked her lips and tried her question again.
“You…okay?”
“Mm-hm.” He lowered his mouth to her neck, placing a
line of warm open-mouthed kisses that led to her ear. “I just want to fuck you.”
He smiled as her inner walls
quivered around him. “And I can’t fuck
you properly like this.”
“Giles…”
“And I want you on top of me,
your nipple between my lips as you ride me…hard…God, as hard as you can…”
“Oh…God….”
“And as soon as you come,
bathing my cock with your deliciously sweet juices…” He stopped his thrusts and pulled back just
enough to look into her passion-glazed eyes.
“I want to make love with you.
Christ, Buffy…I love you…I…”
“Now, Giles…fuck me now…”
“Shit…” He uttered softly as he felt her quivers
quickly increase.
She groaned in protest as he
pulled out of her and held her against his chest and glanced towards the
couch. Before she could actually voice
her protest, he lowered her to the floor instead and followed her down. He smiled as he pushed his jeans further down
and leaned over her, his left hand supporting his weight…his right gripping his
cock as he pushed his way back into her.
“Please, Giles…”
He gave her a quick nod and
pushed himself up until he was kneeling between her thighs. Licking his lips,
he slipped his hands under her knees and lifted her legs…spreading them further
as he plunged into her.
He stared into her eyes as she
cried out his name, shaking his head but not slowing his thrusts. If anything, they increased in speed and
depth as he spoke.
“Quiet…you’ll wake the baby…”
When she glared at him, he
chuckled and moved his left hand to grip his cock as he pulled completely out
and rubbed the head over her clitoris, coating the bundle of nerves with her
own fluids. As she trembled, he pushed
his way back in as hard as he could…delighting in her deep groan.
* * *
Ethan walked into Michael’s
office, a perplexed look on his face.
Michael tilted his head and furrowed his brow slightly.
“What’s wrong, EJ?”
“Rupert’s not in.”
“And?” Michael questioned, lowering his pen to the
desk.
“Well, I…kinda told him to read
something last night. And…well, now I’m
worried that maybe I did the wrong thing because it may have been something
that he shouldn’t have – ”
“My God, what are you rambling
on about now?” Anya asked as she walked
in and handed Michael a file. “My
expenses for last month…”
Michael nodded a thanks and
smiled as he gestured to his husband.
“Ethan’s a bit worried because Rupert isn’t in today.”
“Oh.” Anya waved a hand and grinned at Ethan. “Buffy’s scheduled for patrol tonight.”
When Ethan merely stared at her,
Anya sighed heavily. “They’re having
sex, Ethan. He never comes in when it’s
Buffy’s night to patrol. How did you not
know that?”
“Um…I guess it’s never come up
before.” Ethan replied, sitting down on
the edge of Michael’s desk. “Makes sense
though.”
Anya snorted and shook her head
in amusement. “As if they need a reason. Xander and I have a lot of sex, but…I don’t
think anyone has as much as they do.”
Ethan and Michael just stared at
her as she turned and walked out of the office without another word.
* * *
Buffy threw her head back and bit
her lip in an attempt to keep quiet. She
felt his grunt against her breast as she rode him harder. Knowing that she was dangerously close to
screaming his name, she used the hand that was buried in his hair to pull his
mouth from her nipple. She was barely
able to cover his mouth with hers before her juices flooded over his cock.
Her frenzied kiss eased slightly
as he gripped her hips, stilling her movement as he took control of the
kiss. He kissed her slowly, his tongue
tenderly stroking hers instead of thrusting into her mouth. When he felt her relax atop him and match his
passionate kiss equally, he gently rolled their bodies until she was lying
beneath him.
“Giles…” She whispered as he pulled from the kiss to
look down at her.
He smiled, his thrusts slow and
long as he brushed her sweat-dampened hair from her face. “I love you.”
She reached up, her trembling
fingers stroking the side of his face.
“I’ll come back to you.”
Giles’ smile faded, his eyes
closing for a brief moment. He felt her
fingers slide into his hair, her nails scratching his scalp as her hand moved
to the back of his head. And then she
wrapped her legs around him, heels digging into the backs of his thighs as she
whispered his name.
His eyes opened, staring down at
her as he increased his pace. “See that
you do.”
She drew his mouth back to hers,
knowing that she would do everything possible to do just that. To come back to him, their children, their
friends. She knew that he understood it
was a statement that she couldn’t turn into a promise…as much as she wanted to.
No, she couldn’t promise
him. But, no matter what…she’d come back
to him.
* * *
She watched him change the baby,
lowering his mouth to blow a soft raspberry against Declan’s chest before
redressing him. Seeing the pure joy on
her husband’s face and hearing the delight in their youngest child’s giggle, a
bright smile appeared on her lips.
“I think Willow wants another
baby…”
Giles looked up, tugging a shirt
over the boy’s head. “Oh?”
Buffy nodded and pulled at a
stray thread on the outside seam of her jeans.
“Yeah. She hasn’t come right out
and said it, but…I see the way she looks at Declan. And River.
She’s pretty clucky at the moment.”
Giles chuckled and moved over to
the couch, lowering himself next to her and handing Declan over. “What do you think Oz would say?”
“Oz would give her the moon if
he thought it would make her happy.”
Buffy replied, grinning as Declan snuggled against her. “I think he’s happy with two children, but I
also think he’d consider it…if she’d open her mouth and tell him.”
“Maybe she’s waiting to see if
she truly wants a third or if she’s just feeling a bit…clucky.” He stated, reaching over to run his fingers
through her hair. “Or maybe she realizes
that he’d say ‘yes’ no matter what and she wants to make sure they’re both
ready.”
Buffy nodded slowly and then
looked into his eyes. “Ethan called
while you were in the shower…wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“I’ll call him later.”
She tilted her head and
sighed. “He’s coming over tonight…after
I leave for patrol.”
“Buffy, I do not need a
babysitter.” Giles grumbled, his brow
furrowing.
“I know…and that’s not the
reason he’s coming over.” She reached
over and gently ran her fingertips over his brow. “I think he needs to see for himself that he
did the right thing in telling you about Bradford’s journal.”
“Oh…very well, then.” He sighed melodramatically, causing Buffy to
laugh softly. He paused for a moment and
then licked his lips. “I understand
now.”
“Understand what?”
“Richard once told me, just a
few days before his death, that a father’s love is as powerful as it is
volatile.” The corner of his mouth
twitched. “I thought his illness had rendered
him insane and completely discarded his words.
But, now I understand…and I think I can let the anger go.”
Buffy smiled as she leaned over
and placed a tender kiss on his lips.
~ End