Title: Pictures of
the Past
Author: Froxyn
Rating: FRAO
Pairing:
Buffy/Giles
Timeline: Two
months after Addition.
Synopsis: Ethan
and Michael hit a small bump in their relationship. Can Giles and Buffy help them?
Buffy lay in bed,
staring at the ceiling as she gently rubbed her abdomen. She was now two months pregnant and had just
started showing within the last few days.
Giles was asleep and had been for the past two hours. But, the thoughts racing through Buffy’s head
were keeping her awake.
Rolling onto her side
and facing him, she smiled. He was lying
on his stomach, his left arm curled under his pillow and his right resting
between their bodies. His hair was mussed
from sleep and as her eyes travelled over the scratches on his bare back, her
smile grew. Sleep wasn’t the only thing
that had mussed his hair…her fingers had done their part as well.
She gently prodded
his shoulder with her left hand, sighing as he mumbled unintelligibly. “Giles…”
His brow furrowed and
then smoothed, but he showed no signs that he was awake…or even close to
waking. Buffy gently shook his shoulder
and whispered his name again.
“Mm?” He murmured without opening eyes. “What?”
“How can you
sleep?” She questioned softly.
“I’m tired.” He answered, sliding his right arm over her
hip. “Go to sleep, Buffy.”
“I can’t.”
He opened his eyes
slowly and looked at her. “Perhaps you
should close your eyes.”
“We’re going to have
five children, Giles…” She stated, ignoring
his comment.
His brow furrowed as
his eyes focussed. “Yes, we are. We’ve known this from the time we decided to
have Declan.”
When she hesitated,
he shifted onto his side and gently squeezed her hip. “Buffy?
What is it?”
She bit her lip and
averted her gaze from his. “Can we cope
with five? I mean…that’s a lot of
children…and…”
He interrupted her
with a gentle kiss. His fingers caressed
her cheek as he pulled back slightly and caught her eyes again.
“I remember you being
worried about the same thing with Lucas.”
“No.” She shook her head quickly. “That was me worrying that I wouldn’t have
enough love to share with Lucas…I don’t worry about that with Declan. God, I love him so much…I have from the
moment he was conceived. This is different,
Giles…”
He pushed himself up
and sat back, wincing as the fresh scratches pressed against the wood of the
headboard. He shook his head lightly,
quickly waving her concern to the side as he pulled her onto his lap and wrapped
his arms loosely around her.
“Talk to me, Buffy.”
“Is your back
okay?” She asked, lightly fingering the
golden hoop in his left ear.
“It’s fine,
love. Now…talk to me. Tell me what your true concern is here.”
She settled herself
into a more comfortable position, her fingers tracing the thick scar tissue on
his chest as she took a deep breath.
“It isn’t a question
of whether or not I love him…”
“I know.” Giles whispered, sliding his left hand to the
gentle swell of her stomach. “I know how
much you love him, Buffy.”
“It’s not financial
either. I mean…” She laughed nervously, rubbing her left thumb
over the healed gunshot wound on the right side of his chest. “We’re not really having financial
difficulties…”
He smiled softly and
shook his head. “No, we’re not. So, what is troubling you?”
“I remember when I
was in high school…in
He placed two fingers
over her lips, quietening her as she became more upset with each thought that
went through her head. He shook his head
and offered her a gentle smile.
“We’ll cope,
Buffy. We’ve coped with four…in fairly
difficult situations. You’ve fought
thousands of vampires and demons since we’ve had children. You’ve been able to keep up your training at
least twice a week…we have obligations with our friends and their families that
we’ve upheld over the years…”
He placed a tender
kiss on her lips as he curled a strand of her hair around his finger.
“We’ll cope…I have no
doubt in that. And Declan will feel just
as loved and wanted as Braden, Lucas, Haddie, and Evan do. I have faith in us, Buffy…and I have faith in
our abilities as parents. You have
nothing to fear in this, love. I
promise.”
Buffy’s eyes
glistened as she looked into Giles’ warm eyes.
“How do you do that?”
He tilted his head
slightly. “Do what?”
“Make me feel all not
panicky over things. You’ve always been
able to calm me down…no matter what it is.”
When he raised an eyebrow, she grinned.
“Okay, sometimes it takes longer to calm me down…but, you’ve always been
able to do it. How?”
“At the Academy, we
were told that patience would be needed with our Slayers. We were told that Slayers tend to be more
spontaneous…wanting to rush into battle instead of holding back and thinking
out their plan. For that reason, we were
taught patience and level-headedness.
And we were to excel in those lessons if we wanted our Slayer to live.”
He paused for just a
moment before smiling warmly at her.
“I wanted my Slayer
to live…and so I paid very close attention in class. It also helps that I’m very much in love with
you.” He rubbed his thumb along her jaw
and smiled. “You do the same for me, you
know.”
“I do?” She asked, leaning into his touch.
“Mm-hm.” He carefully removed her from his lap and
laid her down next to him, lowering his body to the mattress and lovingly
caressing her stomach. “Whenever I feel
like my life is tumbling out of control, all I have to do is look at you. Just a glimpse of you is all I need to ground
myself once again.”
She yawned and
snuggled closer to him. “Really?”
“Really.” He whispered, placing a kiss on her forehead
as she closed her eyes.
“What if I’m not
there?”
He smiled and rested
his head on his pillow as he slipped his arm under her neck. “Then I look at our children…and I see the
beauty that we’ve created time and time again.
Our love for each other shines so brightly within them…”
She snorted sleepily
and draped her arm over his side.
“Cheesy, corny, sappy…and yet so very you. I love you too, Rupert.”
“Sleep well,
darling.” He whispered, closing his eyes
and allowing her gentle breathing to lull him back to sleep.
* * *
The next time Buffy
woke, the bedroom was full of light and she was in bed alone. Yawning, she looked over at the clock on the
bedside table and narrowed her eyes. She
wasn’t sure what she didn’t believe most…the fact that she had actually slept
this late or the fact that no one had woken her much earlier.
Sitting up, she
stretched and smiled. The sleep had done
her well, and she had a feeling that she had her husband to thank for the extra
sleep. She glanced down at her stomach and
smiled, gently rubbing the small swell as she climbed out of bed.
“What do you say
about going to see what your Daddy and brothers and sister are up to? And…maybe coercing your father into cooking
us a big breakfast this morning…”
The heaviness of the
conversation she had had with Giles earlier in the morning was gone. She knew, thanks to Giles’ persistence, that
their family would be able to cope with Declan’s arrival. And with a bright smile, she made her way
into the ensuite and turned the shower on.
* * *
Giles smiled as he sat
on the couch, flanked by his two older sons.
Haddie sat on the floor, singing softly along with the song currently
playing on the stereo. Evan was
stretched out next to her, lying on his back and using Callie as a pillow, his
eyes alternating between his sister and the television screen.
Giles held the
controller in his hands, furrowing his brow as he stared at the television
screen. “Alright, so what do I do now?”
“Press ‘x’…” Lucas supplied helpfully, ignoring Braden’s
quick glance.
Giles pressed the ‘x’
button, his eyes widening as he watched his animated character jump from the
cliff to the depths below. Lucas laughed
maniacally, causing Evan to giggle.
“You wasn’t supposed
to do that, Daddy.”
“Weren’t.” Giles corrected automatically as he glanced
at his youngest son. “And thank you for
that useful piece of information, Evan.”
Evan giggled again
and sat up, reaching behind him and rubbing Callie’s soft fur. “Luke tricked you!”
Giles laughed and
nodded in agreement. “Yes, he did. Which will teach me to be more wary of his
directions in the future.”
His eyes darted to
the hallway, his smile growing as Buffy walked into the room. “Good morning.”
“You let me sleep
in…” She stated softly as Evan ran over
to her and wrapped his arms around her legs.
“Thought you needed
it.” He responded, watching Evan give
Buffy’s stomach a gentle pat. “How are
you feeling this morning?”
“Much better, thank
you.” She gestured towards the
television and grinned. “You got talked
into playing?”
“Mm…yes. And then I was tricked into jumping off a
cliff.” He answered, laughing as Lucas
grinned. “Would you like something to
eat?”
“I wouldn’t say no.”
He handed his
controller to Lucas and stood up, motioning for Buffy to take his place. “Eggs, toast, sausage?”
“Mm…all of the
above.” Buffy murmured as she gave him a
tender kiss before sitting down on the couch between Braden and Lucas. “And maybe some hash browns? If it’s not too much trouble, I mean…”
Giles smiled down at
her and shook his head. “Not too much
trouble, love.”
Buffy watched him
walk into the kitchen and sighed happily.
Braden looked up at her and smiled.
“You feeling okay,
Mum?”
“Yeah, I am. Why do you ask?” She questioned as she ran her fingers through
her son’s dark hair.
Braden shrugged a
shoulder and glanced at her stomach. “I
remember you being a little sick when you were pregnant with Evan.”
“Well, it didn’t help
that I got the flu with I was pregnant with Evan. But, I’m feeling fine right now.”
Braden smiled and
turned his eyes back to the screen. His
fingers pressed the buttons quickly, moving his character down the maze-like
paths.
“Declan’s a good
name.”
Buffy smiled and
placed a kiss on her oldest child’s head.
“Thank you.”
“Mummy? Can you help us?” Haddie called over, looking expectantly at
Buffy. “Evan put glue on both sides of
the paper and now it’s not working.”
“Why did you put glue
on both sides, Ev?” Buffy asked as she
carefully stepped over cords and sat down with Haddie and Evan.
Evan exhaled deeply
and held up a colored piece of construction paper. “Because I was going to put orange on top of
the blue right here. But then Haddie
said she didn’t want orange on it. Don’t
know why…”
Haddie narrowed her
eyes at her younger brother. “Because I
don’t like orange.”
“I do. It’s my fav’rite color.” Evan announced, pouting as Haddie took the
orange paper from him.
“Okay…” Buffy started as she went through the scraps
of paper on the floor surrounding them. “You
both like green and yellow…what if we put some green here with a yellow strip
going through it?”
After a moment’s
hesitation, both children gave a nod of agreement and the three of them set to
work.
A few minutes later,
Giles peeked around the corner and smiled.
Braden and Lucas were playing the game and playfully exchanging
jibes…Buffy was on the floor with Haddie and Evan, happily plastering pieces of
colored paper together.
He chuckled softly as
Evan picked up the piece he was working on a smiled happily.
“I made a tennis
racquet!”
Since
Just as he was going
to announce that Buffy’s breakfast was ready, the phone rang. Giles sighed and made his way to the phone,
catching Buffy’s eye on his way.
“Your breakfast is on
the counter, love.” He gave her a warm
smile as he picked up the handset.
“Hello?”
“Mornin’, Rupert.”
“Good morning,
Ethan.” Giles smiled as Evan looked up
quickly. “I was going to call you later
today. Apparently it’s been too long
since Evan has seen you.”
Ethan chuckled. “Give the little guy a hug from me.”
“Will do.” Giles heard something in Ethan’s tone,
something that he couldn’t quite put a finger on. “What’s going on?”
Ethan sighed. “You always know, don’t you?”
“Not always.” Giles answered quietly, walking back into the
kitchen with Buffy right behind him.
“But, something tells me that this isn’t just a social call.”
“I, uh…Michael came
across something this morning…and…”
Ethan sighed heavily. “I had
forgotten all about it…”
Giles pushed Buffy’s
plate towards her and handed her a fork.
“All about what?”
“A box of pictures.”
Giles pointed to the
plate and met Buffy’s eyes. “Eat.”
“What?” Ethan asked in confusion.
“Not you…” Giles shook his head. “Pictures, you said?”
“Yeah.” Ethan answered hesitantly. “Pictures of us…from years ago. I don’t remember who took them…but they were
given to me about five years later as payment.”
“Payment?”
“For a favour I did
for someone…” Ethan responded
distractedly. “Anyway, we were rummaging
around the attic earlier and Michael came across it. I think I really fucked up this time,
Rip. The letter that came with the
pictures was still there as well…I’m not sure which bothered him more, the fact
that I have the pictures or the fact that I gave into blackmail to get them. I know that you think that Buffy knows
everything about our past – ”
“No, she does
know everything.” Giles corrected
quickly. “I told her everything well
before we got married.”
“Giles?” Buffy whispered in a worried tone.
Giles sighed and
reached over the counter, taking Buffy’s hand.
“Ethan and Michael came across some pictures this morning…of Ethan and
me.”
Buffy breathed a sigh
of relief and lifted a forkful of eggs to her mouth. “Oh…well, I guess it’s a good thing that
Michael already knew about the two of you.”
Ethan heard her reply
and closed his eyes. “There’s a
difference between knowing and seeing proof of it.”
Giles lowered his
eyes. “What do you mean?”
“Michael knows of our
past as well. But, it still hurt him to see
them…hurt him deeply.” Ethan swallowed
and took a deep breath before continuing.
“Rupert…these pictures were taken the night we raised Eyghon for the
third time…the night he asked certain things of us.”
Giles paled and
closed his eyes. “Oh dear Lord. Is Michael…is he alright?”
“He, uh…he went for a
walk. That was a few hours ago…”
Giles swallowed
nervously and nodded. “Stay there, wait
for Michael. I’ll ask Joyce to watch the
children and Buffy and I will come over…”
“Rupert, these
pictures…they’re…well, they don’t leave much to the imagination.”
“I can imagine.” Giles responded quietly. “We’ll see you soon.”
Before Ethan had a
chance to argue, Giles ended the call and placed the phone on the counter.
Buffy reached over
and placed her hand over his. “Giles…I
already know what happened…”
“So did Michael. However, as Ethan stated…there is a
difference between knowing and seeing physical proof.”
Buffy’s eyes
widened. “Did Michael leave?”
Giles bit his bottom
lip and stared at their hands. “Ethan
said he went for a walk. I’m fairly
certain that Michael just needed some time alone to think. The problem is…I may have told you
everything, but…these pictures are graphic.
It hurt him to see them…and they’ll probably hurt you as well.”
Buffy gave a soft
nervous chuckle. “Well, I’ve seen gay
porn…that didn’t hurt me to watch…”
Giles raised his eyes
and stared at her. “This is very
different, Buffy.”
“You’re scared.” She whispered, all traces of her smile
leaving quickly. “My God, Giles…how bad
is it?”
Seeing movement out
of the corner of his eye, Giles quickly turned to find Lucas standing in the
doorway. Giles gently squeezed Buffy’s
hand and smiled at their son.
“Become bored with
the game already?”
Lucas darted his eyes
between his parents and shook his head.
“Evan wanted a go. Is everything
okay?”
Buffy nodded,
offering Lucas a smile. “Yeah, we were
just talking.”
“Is Declan okay? Tommy’s mother was pregnant a while back and
the baby got sick and died…”
Giles shook his head
quickly as Lucas’ eyes began to fill with panic. “No, son.
Declan is fine, I promise.
Everything is alright.”
Lucas took a deep
breath and smiled. “Good.” He moved to the refrigerator and opened the
door. “Haddie wants some milk…”
Buffy smiled, sliding
her hand out from under Giles’ and placing it on top of his. He looked down at their hands as she ran her
thumb over the back of his hand. Lucas
continued rambling as he poured a glass of milk for his sister.
Giles was nervous
about Buffy seeing the pictures, but knew they’d work through whatever emotions
they caused. He just hoped that Michael
and Ethan were going to be able to do the same thing.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Buffy took hold of
Giles’ hand as they walked towards the Raynes’ front door. She looked up at him when she felt his hand
tremble.
“Hey…”
He swallowed, using
his left index finger to push the doorbell, and looked down at her. “I’m just extremely nervous.”
She rubbed his chest
with her right hand and smiled softly. “We’re
stronger than some pictures that are…how old?”
“Thirty-five
years…give or take.” He answered
quietly. “But there were certain
instances…I didn’t tell you complete details of everything, Buffy.”
“I know…just like I
didn’t tell you everything about Angel or Riley. You know what happened, but you don’t know
every single detail…because there’s no need.”
Giles lowered his
eyes. “I’m fairly certain that the
things that were asked of Ethan and me are – ”
She placed the
fingers of her right hand over his lips and shook her head. “Stop, Giles.
I love you. I’m in love with
you. We have this whole for better, for
worse, in sickness and in health thing going on here. This…all of this happened before I was even
born. I can’t hold any of this against you…and
I wouldn’t want to. We’ve had this
conversation way too many times over the years…and we’ll get through this, just
like we have everything else.”
He opened his mouth
to respond, his words dying in his throat as the front door opened. He turned his eyes to his friend, swallowing
hard when he noticed the sadness in Ethan’s eyes.
“Rupert, Buffy…” He stepped back from the doorway and
sighed. “Thank you for coming.”
As they stepped
inside, Giles paused and placed his free hand on Ethan’s shoulder. “Are you alright?”
Ethan exhaled deeply
and pulled away from Giles’ touch, closing the door as he cleared his
throat. “Michael’s home.”
Buffy watched her
husband carefully, sighing sadly as she watched his hand fall back to his
side. Ethan brushed by them, heading
back to the living room where presumably Michael was. Giles stood silently, staring after Ethan,
until Buffy gently squeezed his hand.
He shook his head and
met Buffy’s eyes. “I, uh…I can’t
remember the last time that he pulled away from me like that.”
“It’s not you,
honey. You know that Michael has to be
upset…” She took a step forward as he
nodded in agreement, gently pulling him with her. “Come on.
The quicker we know what’s going on, the quicker we can set things
straight again.”
Giles said nothing,
but followed Buffy down the hall. As
they walked into the living room, Michael’s sad eyes caught his. Michael opened his mouth, but no sound was
made. Instead, he shook his head sadly
and took a long drink from the glass held in his hand.
Giles took a deep
breath and sat down on one of the couches, pulling Buffy down with him. It didn’t go unnoticed that while Ethan was
sitting on the other couch, Michael was sitting off to the side in a chair.
“Perhaps we should start
with the letter that came with the pictures?”
Giles asked softly.
Ethan nodded slowly,
looking over at his husband. “Michael?”
Michael snorted and
waved his hand towards the box resting on the coffee table. “Do what you want, Ethan.”
Ethan closed his eyes
briefly in an attempt to hide his pain.
His eyes were glistening with unshed tears as he reached out and pulled
the letter from the box. Giles noticed
the tremble in Ethan’s hand as he took the letter.
Giles took a deep
breath and carefully read the letter, his brow furrowing as he reached the end
of the instructions that the author of the letter had given Ethan.
“Do you know who gave
these to you?” Ethan shook his head and
Giles sighed. “There are too many
details given…whoever wrote this was there that night, or knows someone who
was.”
Ethan nodded and ran
his fingers through his hair. “Problem
is…I couldn’t tell you who was there. I
was so high that I barely remember being there.
It all seems like a dream instead of reality.”
Michael finished his
drink and stared at Ethan. “You can’t
take pictures of dreams, Ethan.”
Ethan returned
Michael’s stare. Giles and Buffy watched
the standoff for a few seconds before Giles leaned forward and spoke softly.
“Michael, there were
extenuating circumstances at work here.
If we hadn’t been under the influence of drugs and magick, this wouldn’t
have happened. But we were…and – ”
“You fucked
him.” Michael interrupted coldly. “You tied him up and fucked him.”
Giles cleared his
throat and nodded. “Yes, I did.”
Michael glanced at
Buffy, surprised that he didn’t see anger or hurt in her eyes. “And you’re okay with this?”
“It was a long time
ago, Michael.” She glanced at Ethan,
then Giles, and then returned her gaze to Michael. “I accepted Giles’ past long before we were
considering marriage. Ethan told you
about his past relationship with Giles when you first started dating. He loves you, Michael. If he didn’t love you, he wouldn’t have told
you anything.”
A tear escaped
Michael’s right eye and rolled down his cheek.
“He didn’t tell me how the demon requested them to prove their
allegiance to him.”
Buffy’s brow furrowed
as she glanced at Ethan and then Giles.
“Sex…I already knew that.”
Giles exhaled
deeply. “Not just sex, Buffy…submission. Ethan had to submit to me, as I had to submit
to him.”
Buffy stared at her
husband. “You said that Ethan hadn’t – ”
He interrupted her
quickly. “He didn’t. Ethan never fucked me…but, I submitted to
him…his power.”
“I’m confused…” Buffy whispered softly.
Ethan cleared his
throat and met Buffy’s eyes. “I gave
Rupert my body…Rupert then accepted my essence into his mind. It was probably one of the most powerful
things I’ve ever experienced…being inside of his mind, learning how he thinks…”
“You know how he
thinks?” Buffy asked, her eyes widening
in disbelief.
Ethan shook his head
slowly, the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “No. I
know how he used to think. He’s changed
a great deal in the past thirty-five years.”
Before Buffy could
ask another question, and before Ethan could continue, Giles cleared his throat
and added another detail to the night in question.
“There was also the
mixing of blood…blood magick bonding us to each other…and Eyghon.”
At Buffy’s look of
utter confusion, Michael sighed. “The
tattoos.”
Buffy turned her gaze
to Michael, silently requesting him to continue. He looked down at the empty glass held in his
hands and narrowed his eyes as he collected his thoughts.
“They tattooed each
other. Rupert mixed his blood into the
ink he used to tattoo Ethan. Ethan did
the same when he tattooed Rupert. And
then they let the demon taste their blood…”
Buffy thought for a
second and then looked at Giles. “That’s
how he was able to find you?”
Giles nodded
slowly. “Yes.”
Buffy shook her head
quickly. “No, that can’t be
right…because when Ethan tattooed me, Eyghon came after me…”
“I added some of
Rupert’s blood to the ink I used on you.”
Ethan admitted softly, earning him the incredulous stares of the three
other people in the room. “It was the
only way that I could assure that he wouldn’t come after me.”
“That explains the
confusion in the demon’s eyes.” Giles
stated, unconsciously rubbing his arm where his tattoo still remained.
When Buffy looked at
him questioningly, he sat back against the cushions and took a deep
breath.
“Eyghon was being
called to me, but came to you. And then
I showed up…”
“Two Giles’…which would
be confusing.” Buffy finished for him.
Michael stared at
Ethan, anger showing in his eyes. “You
were going to sacrifice Buffy to save yourself?”
Ethan swallowed
nervously. “I knew that he’d save
her. It was his duty to keep her safe.”
“So that made it
okay?” Michael’s voice rose slightly.
“No.” Ethan replied softly, standing and making his
way to Michael. He knelt on the floor
and reached up, touching Michael’s cheek as he continued. “But, I was a different person then,
Michael. It wasn’t okay…and I’ve
apologized profusely to both Rupert and Buffy for my behaviour during that
time…but, at the time I was just trying to protect myself.”
When Michael lowered
his eyes, Ethan gently brushed his fingers through Michael’s hair.
“I’ve done many
things that I’m not proud of, Michael…and I’m sure I still have things to atone
for…but, everything that happened in the past made me the person I am now. And the person I am now is the man who is in
love with you.”
Michael was quiet for
a moment and then swallowed.
“Do you still love him?”
Ethan lowered his
hand to Michael’s chest and sat back on his heels, shaking his head. “Mike…those pictures, they weren’t about
love.”
“I know.” Michael whispered, covering Ethan’s hand with
his own. He gave Ethan’s hand a gentle
squeeze before pulling it from his chest.
“But you did love him.”
“I did.” Ethan agreed softly. “But, that was so long ago…and I married you.
Besides…my love for Rupert was completely one-sided. He may have cared about me, as he does now,
but he never held any feelings of
love for me.”
“Do you still love
him?” Michael repeated, looking directly
into Ethan’s eyes.
Ethan sighed, but
didn’t lower his eyes. “A part of me
will always feel something for Rupert.
But am I still in love with him?
No, Michael…I’m not.”
Michael’s response
was interrupted by the ringing of Ethan’s mobile phone. Ethan reached over to the coffee table and
picked up the phone, fully intending to turn it off. He glanced at the caller id and quickly
answered instead.
Michael started to
protest the fact that Ethan answered the call, but stopped when he heard Ethan
say Xander’s name. Buffy and Giles
glanced at one another as Ethan spoke hurriedly before nodding absently and
ending the call.
He looked up and met
Michael’s eyes. “Anya’s having the
baby.”
At that moment,
Buffy’s mobile started ringing. She
answered quickly, knowing that it would be Xander informing them of the
news. As she spoke into the phone, Giles
watched Ethan and Michael carefully.
“You need to
go.” Michael stated, a sad tone to his
voice.
Ethan shook his head
and reached for Michael’s hand. He
exhaled slowly, tenderly stroking Michael’s skin with his thumb.
“I’m not leaving,
Michael. I can’t…not right now…”
Michael swallowed and
took a deep breath. “You should go.”
When Ethan shook his
head, Michael continued. “You are this
child’s biological father…they wanted you there, Ethan. You go…I’ll stay here with Buffy and
Rupert…call me when she arrives and I’ll come.
I just…it’s important for you to be there…and it’s important that I talk
to Rupert, alone.”
Ethan hesitated, only
giving his silent agreement when Michael’s softly whispered ‘please’
sounded. Ethan stood and leaned down,
brushing his lips over Michael’s cheek.
“I love you.” Ethan whispered before turning and giving
Giles a quick nod before grabbing his keys.
Giles cleared his
throat. “Give our regards?”
“Of course.” Ethan replied, giving him and Buffy a soft
smile. “I’ll call in a little while.”
After meeting
Michael’s eyes once more, he turned and left the room. Buffy ended her phone call with Xander and
looked up at her husband.
“The doctors seemed
to think she’s going to have a quick labour this time.”
Giles nodded slowly
before glancing at the envelope of pictures on the coffee table. With a steadying breath, he leaned forward
and picked it up. His fingers played at
the flap as he looked over at Michael.
“What is in here
isn’t indicative of the normal parameters of my relationship with Ethan at that
time, Michael.”
Michael swallowed,
his eyes darting to the envelope before returning to Giles’ concerned green
eyes. “Logically, I know. And I also know that what the two of you were
doing in those pictures isn’t going to be repeated.”
“He truly loves
you.” Giles whispered, staring into
Michael’s eyes. “He would never do
anything to intentionally hurt you.”
“I know.” Michael whispered back, lowering his
eyes. “But, he should’ve told me.”
He looked up quickly
and stared at Buffy. “Doesn’t it bother
you that Rupert didn’t tell you about this?”
Buffy thought for a
moment and then shook her head. “Maybe
it should, but it doesn’t. I mean…this
happened so many years ago…and, not only that, I’m fairly certain that even Giles
and Ethan don’t remember all of the details.”
Giles nodded in
agreement with Buffy’s statement. “I,
uh…that’s very true. The night this
happened…I…we…”
“Were drunk and
high?” Michael offered, leaning forward
and resting his elbows on his knees.
“Quite.” Giles admitted. “As well as being young and stupid.”
“Ethan thought you
might know who took the pictures…”
Michael responded after a brief moment, gesturing to the box.
“I’m rather sure I
don’t remember who was there either.”
Giles took a deep breath and dropped the envelope back onto the coffee
table. “But that’s not the most
important thing right now, is it?”
“He thinks I’m going
to leave him, doesn’t he?”
“I think he’s worried
about it.” Giles admitted, holding
Michael’s gaze. “It wouldn’t be the
first time that someone who he loves…and someone who loved him…had left him
over the past he shares with me.”
“I’m not Anna.” Michael stated, standing up suddenly and
beginning to pace. “I accepted his
past. I trust him…and you…to not relive
the past. But, to see it…to hold those
pictures…I…God, I love him.”
Giles stood up and
grabbed Michael’s arm, pulling him into a hug as the younger man choked down a
sob. “He loves you, Michael. Don’t let our youthful stupidity come between
you. If you leave him, leave him for
something worthwhile…not this.”
Buffy watched them,
listened to their shared words. When
Michael gently pulled from Giles’ embrace and wiped the tears from his face,
Buffy offered him a warm smile.
“Ethan would probably
like someone to pass the time with…”
“I was so horrible to
him when he left.” Michael’s voice
trembled. “I didn’t even tell him that I
love him.”
“Why don’t we drop
you off at the hospital…and you can tell him just that?”
Michael nodded
absently, glancing at the box on the coffee table. “What about those?”
Giles cleared his
throat. “I, uh…I can take care of them…”
“Thank you.” Michael whispered.
Giles gave him a soft
nod and gestured towards the hall.
“Whenever you’re ready, we can go.”
Michael sniffled and
then jerked his thumb over his shoulder.
“I just need to clean myself up…I won’t be long.”
Buffy’s smile shone
in her eyes. “Take your time,
Michael. Ethan’s not going anywhere.”
For the first time
since they’d arrived, Michael smiled. It
was a small one, just a tug at the corner of his mouth, but it was there.
Giles exhaled slowly
as Michael turned and made his way to the bathroom. He looked down at Buffy, pulling her in front
of him and sliding his arms around her.
She slid her arms
over his shoulders, her thumbs gently rubbing against the back of his
neck. “Do you think they’ll be okay?”
He thought for a
moment and then nodded. “I think they
will.”
“What are you going
to do with the pictures?”
He unconsciously
darted his eyes towards the box. “Burn
them.”
“Can I look at them
first?”
His eyes snapped back
to hers. “I’m not sure that I want to see them.”
Buffy smiled
understandingly. “I didn’t mean that I
wanted to get off on them.”
“I…don’t know,
Buffy.”
“Will you think about
it?” She asked softly, pressing a tender
kiss to his chin.
“I make no
promises.” He whispered seriously.
“I know.” She whispered in return. “I love you, Giles.”
He response was
interrupted by Michael’s return to the room.
He met Michael’s eyes and smiled softly.
“Are you ready,
then?”
Michael nodded slowly
and ran his hand through his hair in a nervous gesture. Buffy smiled and slipped out of Giles’ arms.
“You look very
handsome, Michael.”
Michael blushed
lightly as Giles nodded in agreement.
With a small smile, he walked past Buffy and Giles and into the hallway
that led to the front door. Giles took
Buffy’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.
With no further
words, Buffy picked up the small box of pictures before they followed Michael
out of the house.
* * *
Ethan sat in the
waiting room, twisting his wedding ring as he attempted to ignore the sound of
two people arguing on the other side of the room. The television was on and he had tried to
concentrate on the inane game show playing, but his thoughts kept rushing back
to Michael.
As the woman’s voice
became more shrill, Ethan lifted his head and looked over at them. The man looked utterly embarrassed by the
woman’s behaviour and Ethan shook his head sympathetically at him.
The man shot him a
nervous smile and then turned his attention back to the woman.
Ethan rolled his eyes
and dropped his eyes back to the magazine open across his thighs, his fingers
idly twisting his ring again. He
furrowed his brow as a shadow fell across the page. When the shadow didn’t move, he raised his
head with the intention of requesting that the person move.
The words never made
it past his lips. The owner of the
shadow was his husband.
“Michael…”
Michael swallowed and
sat down in the chair next to Ethan’s, glancing at Ethan’s left hand. “Is that a nervous tic or are you thinking
about taking it off?”
“I would imagine that
it’s nerves.” Ethan replied softly after
a moment’s hesitation. “Is something
wrong?”
Michael looked into
Ethan’s eyes and nodded. “Yes…you were
here alone.”
Ethan’s fingers left
his ring and he turned in his chair to face Michael. “But not anymore…”
“No…not
anymore.” Michael stated softly, lifting
his hand to the side of Ethan’s face.
“Michael…”
“I love you,
Ethan.” Michael whispered, tenderly
rubbing his thumb against Ethan’s cheek.
“And I’m so sorry that I got so upset.”
“It couldn’t have
been easy to see those…” Ethan said
quietly, leaning into Michael’s touch.
“I’m not sure why I haven’t gotten rid of them before. I…I actually thought I had. But, I will…I swear, I’ll burn them as soon
as we get home.”
Michael smiled and
leaned forward, pressing a warm kiss to Ethan’s lips. “Rupert’s taking care of them.”
“I love you,
Michael.” Ethan whispered emotionally,
his eyes glistening as he slid his right hand to the back of Michael’s
neck. “I love you so much.”
The arguing from
across the room stopped as Ethan pulled Michael in for a passionate kiss. The man’s eyes widened as his wife nudged him
in the ribs.
“See? If you would just admit that you were wrong,
we could be doing that right now instead of arguing in circles.”
Ethan deepened the
kiss, causing the man to blush heavily and lower his eyes.
Giles sat on the floor
in front of the fireplace watching the flames lick around the edges of the
small box of photographs. Buffy sat at
his side, her head resting on his shoulder and her hand on his thigh. Joyce had
offered to keep the children overnight, an offer that Buffy and Giles had taken
her up on quickly.
The box hadn’t even
been opened when they returned home.
Buffy had decided that she didn’t want to see them…there was no need.
Giles had been
extremely grateful for her decision.
“Do you think they’re
okay?”
“Hm?” He blinked quickly and looked down at her as
her soft voice interrupted his thoughts.
“Ethan and Michael…do
you think they’re okay?”
“Oh.” Giles nodded as he lifted his hand and combed
his fingers through her hair. “Yes. Yes I do.”
When his fingertips
brushed over the nape of her neck, over the spot where a tattoo had been
removed many years earlier, she exhaled a deep breath.
“How did he get your
blood?”
Giles furrowed his
brow. “I’m sorry?”
“When he tattooed me,
he mixed your blood with the ink. How
did he get your blood?”
“Oh…” Giles responded, clearing his throat before
he continued. “I would imagine from the
wall.”
“Huh?” Buffy asked, obviously confused.
He looked down at his
left hand, which was currently resting on her knee. He flexed his fingers and chuckled
softly.
“My, uh…third punch
missed him and hit the wall. Flesh
versus brick…the brick won. I remember
you mentioning my knuckles…”
Buffy nodded
slowly. “Yeah…you told me it was
nothing. Of course, you didn’t want to
talk at all about that night for a long time…”
Giles cleared his
throat, his eyes watching his fingers rub her knee. “It…was a difficult night.”
“It didn’t turn out
like you wanted it to at all, did it? I
mean…the night was supposed to end with Jenny in your bed, not with your
knuckles cut and bleeding after a fight with Ethan Rayne.”
Giles looked up
quickly, his fingers stopping their motion as he looked into her eyes. “It was for the best, in the long run.”
When Buffy tilted her
head in a silent question, he took a deep breath and lifted his hand to the
side of her face.
“Had Jenny and
I…well, it never would’ve worked, you know.
I would’ve been unable to be faithful to her…and I would’ve hurt her
deeply.”
“Giles…”
“It’s true.” He whispered, caressing her cheek with the
tips of his fingers. “I loved her,
yes. But…nothing could have stopped my
love for you growing into what it is now.
The night that I first kissed you would have still happened…no matter
who I was in a relationship with at the time.”
“I know.” Buffy answered back, her voice a whisper as
well. “And nothing could’ve stopped me
from letting it go further…”
His eyes darted to
her lips as his hand trailed down her arm.
“I want you, Buffy…”
“Yeah?” Her voice trembled as he moved forward,
gently pushing her down onto the floor.
He gave her a gentle
smile as he laid down beside of her, draping his left leg over hers. He propped his head up with his right hand as
his left lovingly rubbed her abdomen.
“Mm, yes.” He answered, his smile growing when she
shuddered as his fingers edged under the hem of her shirt. “Right here, right now…”
As he spread his
fingers across her stomach, she grinned and began working on the buttons of his
shirt. “I’m glad that’s one thing that
hasn’t changed.”
He raised an
eyebrow. “What? That I want to take you here and now? That’s something that I can’t imagine ever
changing.”
Buffy giggled and
shook her head, pushing his now unbuttoned shirt open with her hands. “No, that’s not what I meant. I meant that…” She glanced down at his hand before meeting
his eyes again. “You touching the
baby…that’s something that I’ve always loved.”
“So have I.” His eyes sparkled as he leaned down and
kissed her warm lips.
Conversation paused
as his tongue slipped into her mouth.
Her groan rumbled in her chest as he pulled the button on her jeans free
and slid the zipper down. She could feel
his erection pressing against her hip as he leaned over her, his tongue sliding
along hers.
When she lifted her
hips as he tugged her jeans down her thighs, he broke the kiss and smiled. “I love you.”
Just as she was
getting ready to respond, he dropped her jeans to the side and pushed her shirt
up…exposing the slight swell of her belly.
When he brushed his lips over her navel and whispered “I love you too,
Declan”, she ran her trembling fingers through his hair.
“God, I love you,
Giles.”
Lifting his head, he
offered her a smile as he pushed himself up.
His voice was thick with desire as he gently nudged her legs apart.
“You sound…aroused…”
Her eyes drifted to
his chest as he shrugged his shirt off, allowing it to fall to the floor as he
moved to kneel between her thighs. “So
do you.”
He grinned as his
fingers unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans.
“Perhaps that’s because I am.”
She licked her lips
as he pushed his jeans and boxers down his thighs, exposing his thick
erection. She murmured appreciatively as
he slowly stroked the hardened flesh.
“Please?”
He leaned forward,
supporting his upper body with his right hand on the floor next to Buffy’s head
as he used his left to guide his cock to her.
She groaned as he slowly slid inside of her, tilting her head back and
exposing her throat to him. Once he was
fully embedded within her, he lowered his mouth to her throat…sucking and
nibbling on the tender flesh as he held his hips still.
“Jesus…Giles…” She whimpered as she slid her hands to his
back and wrapped her legs around his waist.
“God, please!”
He chuckled softly
and lifted his head, placing a soft kiss on her lips before looking into her
eyes. “No need to beg, love.”
“Then…oh dear
God!” She cried out as he quickly pulled
his hips back and plunged forward. “Yes,
fuck yes!”
Relying on his knowledge
of her body and her movements, and being able to read her desires in those
movements, he pushed his upper body up and stared down at her. He watched her writhe beneath him for a few
moments before giving in and slamming his hips against her.
Her nails raked down
his back, sweat glistening on her skin as she matched him thrust for
thrust. His eyes drifted to her breasts,
slightly larger than they were just a few months earlier, jostling with their
combined movements.
“Hey…”
He darted his eyes to
her eyes at the hoarse sound of her voice.
“Alright?”
She nodded quickly,
her smile showing in her eyes. “Eyes,
not boobs…”
He slowed his
thrusts, smiling down at her. “Can’t
help it…they’re so lovely and firm and…God, your nipples are so tight and hard…”
She slid her left
hand from his back and covered her left breast with it, gently pinching her
nipple with her fingers. She gave a
pleasurable cry as he increased his pace once more, his eyes staring at her
hand.
“Yes, Buffy…don’t
stop…”
She felt his cock
swell within her and knew that he was close…and she was nearly as close as he
was. She held on as hard as she could,
waiting for him…wanting him to come first, to bring her over as his semen
flooded her inner walls.
She smiled as he
groaned her name, throwing his head back as he shortened his strokes. Her fingers roamed over his chest, caressing
the scars before scraping her nails over his pebbled nipples.
“Christ!” He cried, his thrusts becoming erratic. “Buffy, I…I…”
“God, come…come for
me…” She panted, her inner muscles
rippling around his throbbing cock.
“Fuck, Rupert!”
His body trembled
violently and his arms lowered his chest to hers, allowing his lips to find her
neck. His breath was hot against her
skin as he screamed her name, his erection exploding within her depths.
She followed
immediately, screaming in ecstasy as her inner walls gripped his spasming
cock. He murmured incoherently into the
crook of her neck, his thrusts gradually slowing as they fought to catch their
breath. Her hands roamed aimlessly
across his sweat-drenched back, her body shuddering beneath him.
“Jesus…”
He made a sound that
was something between a chuckle and a groan, brushing his lips across her
temple as he softened within her. She
kissed his chest and slid her hands down to his ass, squeezing gently.
“I hope that sound
meant you enjoyed it…”
“Mm…I think ‘enjoyed’
is underestimating it.” He smiled as he
shifted, causing her to groan as he slipped from her. “Maybe we, uh…would you feel up to sleeping
here tonight?”
She rolled onto her
side and looked into his eyes.
“Here? On the floor?”
“Mm-hm.” He murmured glancing at the fireplace. “Here…on the floor, in front of the fire…in
one another’s arms…”
Buffy smiled and
glanced across the room when she heard a soft snore. “Only if you make sure we have a blanket…I
don’t want to be woken up in a few hours with a cold nose in…inappropriate
places.”
“My nose is warm…”
She laughed,
playfully smacking his chest. “I’m
talking about your dog.”
Giles huffed, then
stood and grabbed the large afghan from the couch. “I dare you to tell her she’s a dog.”
Callie snorted and
opened an eye, closing it again after she yawned and snuggled back into her
bed.
Giles lowered himself
to Buffy’s side and wrapped the blanket around their sweaty bodies. “We can go to bed if you’d prefer, I just
thought it would be nice to take advantage of a fire in the fireplace and an
empty house.”
She smiled and
relaxed in his arms, her head on his shoulder.
“No…this is good. Very good.”
He yawned and idly
ran his fingers over her back. “I’m
surprised we haven’t heard from – ”
Buffy laughed as her
mobile phone started ringing. “Xander?”
He regretfully moved
out of her embrace and quickly found her phone.
He scratched his chest as he answered the call. He smiled at Buffy and gave her a nod.
“Seven pounds
two.” He listened again and then
laughed. “Ten fingers, ten toes. Congratulations, Xander…give our love to
Anya.”
He slipped back under
the afghan and nodded absently. “We’ll
be by first thing in the morning, I promise.”
After a few more
moments, Giles smiled and bid Xander a soft ‘goodnight’. After tossing the phone onto the couch, he
pulled Buffy back into his arms and kissed her warmly.
“Ethan and Michael
went home shortly after River’s birth.
According to Xander, Anya said that they looked like they were ‘two
seconds away from humping each other in front of everyone’.”
Buffy smiled brightly
and draped half of her body over his. “I
sincerely hope so.”
Giles grinned and
closed his eyes, pressing a soft kiss into Buffy’s hair. “As do I.”
It wasn’t long before
sleep found them.
* * *
Ethan smiled, a bead
of sweat running down the side of his neck as he leaned down and latched his
mouth onto Michael’s nipple. Michael
groaned, his hips arching to meet each of Ethan’s hard thrusts.
As Michael shuddered
beneath him, his cock twitching as he neared orgasm, Ethan silently thanked any
deity listening for giving him the chance to make things right. Ethan cursed softly as Michael came, semen
splattering his chest…and then he followed suit, exploding within Michael with
a loud cry.
Michael’s body
trembled as he held Ethan close, whispering his love for him. As Ethan kissed him lovingly, Michael knew
that Ethan’s past was just that…the past.
And he could live with that…as long as Ethan and Rupert kept their
promises of not reliving the past.
~ End